


Home is Wherever I'm With You

by Fool_for_love



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Bucky Has A Crush, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Fluff, Grief/Mourning, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Natasha Romanoff (mentioned) - Freeform, Pre-Relationship, Sam Wilson is a Gift, Sarah Wilson - Freeform, Self-Indulgent, Shuri (Mentioned) - Freeform, Steve Rogers (mentioned) - Freeform, Wanda Maximoff (mentioned) - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-27 19:59:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30128046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fool_for_love/pseuds/Fool_for_love
Summary: Two days after the battle with Thanos, Bucky finds himself struggling to find his place, in Wakanda or with the Avengers. A conversation with Sam helps him make a decision.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson
Comments: 4
Kudos: 79





	Home is Wherever I'm With You

Wakanda felt strange to Bucky now. He felt like he did the first time he entered the country- a stranger in a strange land, as it were. Out of his element, damaged, waiting to be put back together. In the years following the conflict with Zemo, Wakanda had become a home to Bucky, in a way that he hadn’t had a home in decades. 

But things had changed in the five years since the Blip. Bucky was used to walking out of time, frozen and refrozen in the ice until he was needed again, but this time the difference was more stark, because he was aware of it. 

He could have stayed in the palace, if he wanted to. He was more than welcome. He could have stuck with Shuri, listened to her smart remarks. He’d grown close with the princess during her time working on his Hydra programming. But the palace was full of Avengers, Avengers mourning one of their own. Mourning Tony Stark. And no matter what Steve told him, Bucky knew that he wasn’t welcome in that atmosphere. He’d been the one to drive the wedge between Steve and Tony, a wedge that didn’t seem to have been repaired in the time that Bucky had been gone. So Bucky took to the outdoors, walking through the streets of Wakanda.

He had been wandering for some time when he realized that his feet were taking him back to his home. The house where he lived on the outskirts of the city. Shuri told him that the building and land hadn’t been occupied during the Blip, that it was still his. It was as though she was giving him permission to leave, to go back to his own space and recover. 

The goats were gone, of course. Bucky did mourn the loss of them. The sounds made by the animals always helped quiet the noise in his mind. The interior of the house was covered in dust. He ran his fingers over the table, leaving three lines in the dust. 

He started cleaning. The task was monotonous, and being able to see his progress with how dirty the place was was soothing. It made him feel like he was accomplishing something. 

He’d just finished the main room when he heard a knock on the door. He frowned, and moved to open it. It was probably Steve, or Shuri, if he had to guess. But he was completely taken aback when he opened the door. 

Sam stood outside, arms crossed, eyes taking in the house. Bucky wracked his brain, but he didn’t remember Sam ever visiting there before. 

“Uh, hi,” he said, voice coming out rusty. He hadn’t spoken much since they’d come back two days before. 

“Hi,” Sam said. He didn’t make a move to enter, or move at all. Bucky looked the man up and down. He was dressed more casually than Bucky was used to, in jeans and a t-shirt. His dark eyes met Bucky’s, and the supersoldier felt a strange shiver down his spine. Sam’s posture looked rigid, and his arms being crossed looked more defensive than angry. 

“Can I.. help you with something?” he asked, hating the awkward note in his voice. He and Sam had… well, not a bad relationship, but they weren’t especially close. They bickered more than anything else. It felt like the only thing they had in common was Steve, so Sam showing up here out of the blue was out of character. 

“Nah, I just couldn’t believe it when Steve said you lived out here. Had to see it with my own eyes. He said something about goats, too.”

Sam’s tone was jovial, playfully teasing like Bucky was used to, but there was a note of tension there. 

“Well, here it is,” Bucky said, gesturing. “Goats are gone. Maybe I’ll get some more.”

“You thinking about staying, then?” Sam asked. 

Bucky shrugged. “I’m not sure. I like it here. But I’ve been gone for a while now.” 

Sam’s jaw clenched at that, at the reminder of the time they missed. “Makes sense, I guess.” 

They stood there again, in awkward silence. Finally, Bucky broke it.

“Do you want to come in, or anything? I’ve just been cleaning. I don't have anything, but you can sit down if you want.” 

Sam gave a short nod, and walked in. Bucky could see him taking in the furniture, the decorations, sparse as they were. The other man’s lips quirked up when he saw the DVD collection, and he wandered over to look at the titles. 

“This seems a bit old school for Wakanda,” he said, scanning the collection. “You ever heard of streaming, man?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “This is easier for an old man like me.” 

Sam snorted. “Glad you’ve come to terms with your age. Between you and Steve, I got worried that I was somehow older than the both of you.”

“Hydra’s brainwashing is pretty thorough. Maybe you are and you just don’t remember.”

That got a laugh out of Sam, a real laugh, and Bucky felt a strange warmth in his chest. 

“Good one,” Sam said, standing up. “It's a nice place. I can see why you stayed so long.”

“It's the first place that’s felt like home in a long time,” Bucky admitted. Sam hummed thoughtfully. 

“Where’s home for you?” Bucky found himself asking. 

“New York,” Sam answered. His voice was softer than usual. “My sister still lives there, with my nephews.”

“I didn’t know you had a sister.” 

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Barnes,” Sam said, winking. Then his face fell again. 

“They're all grown up now,” he said. It was mostly to himself, but Bucky picked up on it. 

“Your nephews?” Bucky asked.

“Yeah. Five years older than the last time I saw them. But for me it's only been a few days. The younger one barely remembers me.” The words tumbled out of Sam like a waterfall, though his face remained stoic and unchanging. 

“How do you know that?” Bucky asked. 

Sam’s fist clenched. “I just got off a call with them. I called Sarah right away, when I got back. But I didn’t see the kids. I did this time.” 

Bucky knew that feeling. He knew it well. He’d woken up from the ice once with the knowledge that his family and friends must all be dead. It was during one of his few, brief moments of clarity with Hydra. 

He settled himself next to Sam on the couch, leaning his elbows on his knees. “I thought everyone I knew was dead until I remembered Steve. For decades. I didn’t always remember it, with the brainwashing, but when I did all I could think about was how much I missed. I missed my sister’s whole life. She got married, I guess. Had some kids. I missed them, too.” 

Sam’s gaze turned to him. Sam’s full, undivided attention had always made Bucky squirm. The man was too perceptive, as though he knew every thought that Bucky was having before he even had it. At first Bucky thought he was uncomfortable because Sam disliked him, but he didn’t think that was the case anymore. 

“What was her name?” Sam asked. 

“Rebecca. She was younger than me.”

“I’m sorry, man. That must have been hard.” 

“It was,” Bucky said. He shrugged a bit, trying to brush off the serious weight of the conversation. “What I’m trying to say is that you still have time with them. It’s weird as all hell to think that you missed someone’s life, but they’re still around. You can get to know them again.”

The words came out carefully. Bucky wasn’t especially good with words, but the speech seemed to work on Sam. His broad shoulders relaxed slightly, and a slight sigh left him. 

“You’re right. I”m going back as soon as I can. After the funeral, I guess.”

Bucky blinked, and his brow furrowed. For some reason he hadn’t been thinking of the other’s leaving. Of course they would, they didn’t live in Wakanda. The idea of Sam specifically leaving was… strange. 

“You could come with, you know,” Sam said. This time he wasn’t looking directly at Bucky. “I bet Sarah would love you.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow. “Are you trying to set me up with your sister?” 

Sam made an exaggerated face of horror. “Hell no. But she has a thing for taking in strays. You’re about as stray as they come.” 

Bucky nudged his shoulder, shoving him over a bit. The familiar gesture surprised Sam, by the look on his face, but it surprised Bucky even more. 

“Why?” Bucky asked suddenly, before he could stop himself. 

“Why what?” 

“Why would you want me to come with you? Not to state the obvious but I didn’t think we were close.” 

Sam’s face closed off a bit, and Bucky winced. He struggled to figure out what he was really trying to say before he spoke again. 

“I mean I don’t understand why you’d want to be… saddled with me, I guess,” he said. Being this honest with anyone besides Steve seemed wrong to him. Well, anyone including Steve. He wasn’t always honest with Steve these days, especially about the effects that his days with Hydra had on him. Steve got this guilt in his eyes, this self loathing, whenever Bucky mentioned it. So this was new. But when Sam’s face cleared, even just slightly, Bucky thought it was worth the attempt. 

“Honestly? I don’t know. Maybe I just want to laugh at you with my sister.” He let out a sigh, running a hand over his short hair. “Or maybe I don’t want to be by myself right now, and you’re one of the only people who went through the same thing.”

“You know, half the universe went through the Blip,” Bucky pointed out. 

“I don’t know half the universe,” Sam chuckled. “But honestly, you’ve been treating me normal, and I appreciate that. Wanda’s grieving Vision, Natasha…”

Sam’s voice trembled slightly, before he was able to steady it. “Natasha’s gone. And Steve’s treating me like I’m gonna break. Or like he’s hiding something. Either way, I guess I just want you around.” 

Bucky couldn’t hold back a grin. “So you don’t hate me. Good to know.”

“I never said that,” Sam protested. “Anyway, my sister always cooks too much food when I come over and I know you eat like a horse.” 

“You should have led with the food,” Bucky said seriously. 

Sam let out another laugh, a bright one, filled with what sounded like relief. Bucky’s heart soared, and he filed that away for future use. 

Maybe if he could keep making Sam laugh, things would be ok. It was a start, at least. 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so incredibly pumped for the Falcon and Winter Soldier premiere tomorrow that I wrote this in one afternoon. I am very, very soft for them and I wanted to write a little bit about them getting closer after the Snap. I hope someone else can enjoy this, it was fun to write!


End file.
